


filled with light

by shin_hoseok



Series: it's always you [4]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, Soccer AU, idk what the title is ahsdhgsgdhsdf there was sth similar in ttf lyrics, mark is 365 so stressed, markhyuck are the cutest beans okay, not gonna lie i was inspired by trigger the fever, sports AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-30
Updated: 2017-06-30
Packaged: 2018-11-21 11:33:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11356659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shin_hoseok/pseuds/shin_hoseok
Summary: hyuck is the new soccer player in the team. mark is kind of lovestruck.





	filled with light

**Author's Note:**

> hi! wow thanks for reading this!   
> this was going to be multi chaptered but until i sit my ass down and write more this will probably stay a one shot ;;;;;  
> anyway i hope you enjoy <33

Mark’s throat is burning as he jogs across the field to join the other boys on their way to the locker room. The grass is wet, heavy rain still falling from the black clouds above. Everything is moist and sticky and there’s nothing he wants more than to take a hot shower right now. 

„Well played.“, Jeno tells him when Mark finally catches up.   
„You too. Your knee okay?“ 

Jeno shrugs and Mark knows that it isn’t. Since his last injury Jeno can’t seem to get back to the way he used to play once and it seems to be stressful. Even though he still technically has two years until he can join the adult team they all know how important it is to show good results even now.

„Want to get some food later?“, Renjun asks lightly as he falls into step next to them. They do it some times after training and Mark loves the additional time he can spend with his friends, but he knows there’s no way.

„Can’t.“, he says. „My mom is cooking tonight and she expects me home.“  
„Ahh, have fun then.“, Jeno says, knocking their shoulders together. „We’ll make sure to send you some pics of the burgers we’ll be eating later.“  
„Who said we were going to eat burgers?“, Renjun asks and seconds later they’re arguing about food while Mark tries not to think about how he’ll have to wait up for Jaehyun so they can drive home together.

The locker room smells like sweat and deodorant when they enter and Mark trots over to the locker that has been his since he can remember. There’s a tiny „M“ carved into the red paint - a dare from when they were younger, Jaehyun and him, always waiting there for their father to finish the training. The locker room had been their second home since forever. He remembers the fear of being discovered, remembers Jaehyun trying to trick him into thinking that someone was coming until Mark was actually about to cry from fear.

„Yo, Mark.“   
„You’re early today.“, Mark says, not even bothering to turn around. Normally Jaehyun doesn’t show up until the training is about to start. He’s always been like that and Mark knows how their father can’t stand it, so he always tries to be everywhere on time. 

„Mom threw me out, said I can’t be late again.“, Jaehyun says, sitting on the bench at their lockers. „Had a good training?“  
„Kinda, though the weather is shit.“  
„Yeah I noticed. Will you wait up?“  
Mark nods and pulls the towel out of his bag, ready to leave for a shower, except Jaehyun catches him by his wrist.  
„Dad said you should come by Mr. Park’s office. Like, right after your training. You can shower afterwards.“  
„Oh.“ Mark blinks at his brother, not knowing what to do with this information. Mr. Park is the trainer of the adult team. „What does he want from me?“  
Jaehyun rolls his eyes.  
„Go and find out. And hurry up, the hyungs will kill you if training doesn’t start on time because our trainer is too busy talking to you.“  


-

 

To say that Mark feels uncomfortable would be an understatement. He wouldn’t mind, normally, but he’s all sweaty and wet and just wants to go home by now.   
„Hello Mark, come in.“   
Mr. Park is short yet incredibly intimidating. Mark has known him for all his life, has grown up watching this man pour his soul out onto the field in every single game - he’s honestly, a role model.

„Hello, Mr. Park.“   
He’s allowed to call him uncle, in theory, but he never does because it feels wrong. 

„I’ll make it short.“, the man promises. „I know you’re only turning eighteen in summer, but I talked to your dad and we’d like to see you try out for my team from next week.“  
„Oh.“ Mark gulps, not knowing what to say. It’s an honor because nobody has ever been accepted into the adult team at his age, but at the same time he doesn’t know if he wants this. Jaehyun never shuts up about how much pressure he’s under, how important each single match is for the club. Mark isn’t sure if he can do it, not when he has to graduate at the same time, but he knows he doesn’t really have a choice anyway.   
„Of course! Thank you, Mr. Park.“  


-

 

Dinner at home is hell. Mark hates himself for loathing it so much but he can’t help it. His father is boasting about him and his mom is all happy and Jaehyun is saying nothing even though Mark wishes he would, because his parents seem to have no idea how much he dislikes the idea of being in that new team.

„When is your first game together?“, their mom asks and Mark gulps down his vegetables, listening to Jaehyun explaining everything. Their first game is actually pretty soon, a few nights before they have that maths exam in school that Mark still hasn’t started studying for. He thinks he might not have time for it anymore, since the adult team has training four times a week and he also has to attend the last game of the Dream team, which means a few weeks of additional training. 

„I’m done, can I go do my homework?“, Mark asks, already getting to his feet. His mom nods even though she doesn’t look delighted when he practically storms out of the dining room and upstairs, hoping to at least get half of his school stuff done before midnight.   
**I’m in 127** , he texts Jaemin, knowing he’s the only friend who’s willing to listen right now, since he’s the only one of the Dream team who most likely isn’t at some restaurant together having fun. **But they want me to stay in Dream for another while and I seriously wanna die right now.**

**_wtf why do you wanna die?_** , Jaemin texts back after seconds as Mark plops down on his bed. **_127 is like everyones wet dream, you even get paid for playing there_**

 

**Yeah but I have school stuff to do. And I don’t even know why they’re taking me into the team, it’s not like I’m the best player in Dream.**

 

**_you’re dumb, hyung, it’s the best opportunity. stop whining and appreciate the chance. if you feel like it’s too much you can still talk to your dad or mr park to take you out of the team :) anyway i promise it will be fun, you get to play with us and the hyungs !!1!!!_ **

 

**Wow I should’ve messaged one of my non-soccer friends, they probably would’ve understood my trouble :-(**

 

**_you dont have any non soccer friends tho and you know we love you_ **

 

**Yeah…**

**Anyway, how’s your injury?**

 

**_still feels like shit but i’ll live. might be back at training soon but i can’t promise :((((_ **

 

**Alright, feel better soon!**

 

**_thx hyung see you @school tomorrow <3_ **

 

Mark sighs, throwing his phone on his pillow. He loves his friends to death, but again he’s feeling like he can’t really talk to them about anything related to playing soccer or how much everyone stresses him out about it. They just don’t get it, because for them it’s all fun and games, whereas for him it’s more, should be more, at least according to his father. It’s not a secret that Jaehyun will be the next Lee to become a somewhat famous soccer player around here (and from then maybe even on a bigger scale) and Mark is pretty sure that he’s the backup plan if Jaehyun fails. Hell, even if Jaehyun doesn’t fail and ends up in the national team someday Mark will probably still have to become a player, just because it’s good for the Lee family name. He loves playing, he really does, but all of it is slowly becoming like a cage that he can’t escape from.   


He’s in the middle of doing english homework, when there’s a knock on his door.   
„Yeah?“, he calls, not putting the pen away until Jaehyun sinks onto his bed, bouncing expectantly. „What is it?“

„Need help with anything?“, Jaehyun asks, peering over at the stack of notes splattered on Mark’s desk. Mark shakes his head, leaning back in his chair. „I was pretty good at this stuff back then.“

„Your grades were shit after you joined 127.“, Mark says honestly, ignoring the urge to kick something because he knows the same will happen to him eventually.  
Jaehyun shrugs.  
„Didn’t matter in the end, did it? It’s not like I was going to become a doctor.“

„No.“ Mark wants to roll his eyes, but it’s not Jaehyun’s fault that he’ll have to work twice as hard from now on. „So, why are you here? I have a shit-ton of homework.“  
„You didn’t seem to happy today and I was wondering why.“, Jaehyun tells him. „I was also wondering when you stopped talking to me when something was bothering you.“  
„Hyung…“ Mark isn’t sure what to say. He kind of wants to tell his brother, but he’s just like his friends and will most likely not understand why Mark doesn’t feel comfortable with the whole situation. „Ah, forget it. I can’t explain.“  
„Don’t stress yourself out too much.“, Jaehyun tells him after a few seconds of silence. „It might be hard to get used at first but you’ll have time to study, okay? I promise. Just because I spent all my free time last year seeing friends and getting drunk that doesn’t mean you have to do the same. Besides, the guys are really looking forward to having you on our team, it’ll be fun.“  
„It’s not like I don’t like the guys or anything.“, Mark says, rubbing his forehead. Most of them he’s known for years and they’re all cool hyungs and great players. „I just don’t know how I’m supposed to manage all of this. Don’t worry though, I’ll find a way. I always do.“  
Jaehyun nods, slowly getting up.   
„Alright, I won’t bother you anymore then.“, he says, walking towards the door. „Just tell me one more thing: Are you sure you still want to keep on going the same path after graduation?“  
„Yeah.“, Mark says and it only occurs to him after his brother has left that nobody has ever asked him about his future before. Everyone just assumed.

 

-

 

It’s raining again, but this time it doesn’t bother Mark. He’s concentrated on the ball at his feet that is moving swiftly as he gets closer and closer to the goal, successfully leaving the player’s of the opposing team behind. It’s nice, all the anxiety suddenly leaving him even though this is probably the most crucial moment of the entire game. Mark loves it when it’s like this, because he’s in a state of mind that filters out everything else, all the sounds of the audience and the disgusting wet feeling that the rain is leaving everywhere and leaves him with nothing but the cool wind and the sprinting towards his goal.  
He doesn’t even remember taking the shot, all he sees is how the ball is flying through the air in slow motion, how the goalkeeper of the opposing team is trying to get it but fails and then suddenly someone is pushing him from behind, a pair of arms around his neck and Mark is back to reality. The cheers from the stands are deafening, but he can’t even properly look over at where his family is sitting because the whole Dream team is surrounding him all of a sudden, Jeno’s grip tightening around his back and Chenle’s high pitched squealing in his ears.   
„Well done, hyung!“, Jisung is yelling over the noise and Mark blinks at him a few times before it hits him that he has actually scored a goal. He knows it means they’ve won, because they’re leading 2:0 now and there’s only two minutes left. For the first time in forever, Mark can’t help the smile forming on his lips, because it feels so, so good. They haven’t won anything in ages, mostly because Jaemin’s sudden absence due to his injury has torn a hole into the team that was hard to fill in, but now they’re actually incredibly close to bringing a trophy home. He reaches out to ruffle Chenle’s hair and looks for Jaemin’s face in the crowd, giving him a thumbs up. Jaemin, who’s probably cheering the loudest looks so proud that Mark is worried he will actually cry.

 

-

 

„Well done, bro!“ Jaehyun pulls him into a hug even though Mark is soaking wet and Mark let’s him for a moment, before pulling away. „Dude this was like, your best game so far.“  
„Thanks.“, Mark mumbles, unable to keep away the smile. „Feels good.“  
„I bet it does.“ Jaehyun pushes past him to high-five the other members of the team as they enter the locker room, everyone looking equally exhausted but happy. „I’m so proud of you guys. Go take a shower, we’re taking you out for dinner later.“  
Mark knows that by „we“ he means the hyungs from 127, simply because he overheard them talking about it at their last training. It’s a nice gesture and he loves spending time with both of his teams because they usually get along well. He _wants_ them to get along well, because chances are he is still staying in Dream for another while since there’s nobody to fill his striker position with Jaemin still hurt. 

Jaemin who is storming into the locker room to throw himself at them (Jeno first because priorities) and gush about he feels like a proud mom. Mark smiles and lets his friend embrace him for a few seconds.  
„Told you it would be great, didn’t I?“, Jaemin mumbles into his ear and Mark has to admit that it’s true. „Now go take a shower you stink.“

 

Later, when they’re squeezed together at a long table in the ramen restaurant they usually go to, Mark in between Renjun and Johnny, they celebrate. MC Ari, the Dream team coach, gives a short speech and everyone who’s in legal drinking age takes a shot. Mark isn’t even eighteen yet but Johnny pushes his beer over so he can have a taste (it’s disgusting and Mark pushes it away to keep nipping at his coke instead).  
Nevertheless, it’s great. He hasn’t been to any of their outings in ages and he’s missed this, the whole team, or in their case, two teams, being silly together and celebrating a win. It’s easier to push through everything negative when feeling loved like this.

 

-

 

Like everything, it takes time. At first he can’t concentrate on doing his homework in the locker room in between practices because it’s uncomfortable and a whole other atmosphere than at home, but with some good Spotify playlists and a supportive brother who kicks people out when they try to bother him it works out. The training is exhausting and he has to change his diet plan again, but their mom is always up to date with it, so it’s not like he has to cook for himself, just try to eat it all no matter how much he doesn’t want to. In the end, all of the struggle pays off, literally, because he’s finally earning his first money (he gets so excited that he promptly buys about twenty packs of kakaotalk stickers that he probably won’t use anyway) and being around his friends so much makes him happy.

He thinks he has gotten used to it all after just two months of training when Mr. Park decides to fuck him over.  
Mark knew they would be getting another striker and it’s not a big deal because it’s necessary and Mark hopes for the new guy to work well with him. 

What he doesn’t expect is for that new player to be so damn good at everything. It’s not even the way he plays, because that is a whole other story, but Mark knows he is screwed as soon as he walks into the locker room on a Tuesday afternoon. He’s sitting on the bench at Mark’s locker, chestnut brown hair falling onto his forehead as he stares at something on his phone and Mark is pretty sure he shouldn’t feel that breathless at the sight of another boy.   
„Uh, sorry.“, he mumbles automatically as he steps closer and the boy looks up at him expectantly. Mark tries to ignore how pretty his face is or how he has the cutest nose and clears his throat a little before saying: „This is my locker.“  
„Oh.“ The boy shifts, leaning against the locker next to Mark’s instead. „Sorry.“  
„Are you the new player?“, Mark asks, not moving from his spot.   
„Yeah.“ The boy smiles softly in a way that makes Mark wonder why he feels all warm all of a sudden. „I’m Donghyuck, nice to meet you.“  
  
-

 

Donghyuck is sixteen, almost a year younger than Mark and he successfully steals Mark’s title as „youngest ever player of the NCT127 soccer team“. He’s an excellent striker and they play well together naturally, except Mark thinks he would be better at it if he could stop himself from staring at Donghyuck’s tan legs whenever he has the opportunity. 

Lee Donghyuck is also the biggest brat he knows. He’s loud and annoying and always makes snarky remarks. He isn’t scared of being savage towards his hyungs even though he just got to know them and now matter how much they pretend to be annoyed by his constant presence Mark sees how much they start liking him after just a few weeks.   
The worst thing is that Mark likes him too. He wishes Donghyuck was an awful person, just so he could stop admiring him so much (at least he calls it admiring when he, deep down, knows that it might be something else), but the younger boy is charming and sweet and soon enough they’re sort of friends.

 

-

  
„Do you know Michael Jackson?“, Donghyuck asks when they’re sitting on the floor of the locker room, their school books and notes spread between them. They don’t go to the same school but they always do their homework together nowadays because it’s more fun than doing it alone.

Mark blinks at him, because who doesn’t know Michael Jackson, before nodding and voicing that thought.

„Okay but do you _like_ Michael Jackson?“

„He’s okay I guess?“, Mark muses, leaning his head against the locker. Donghyuck is wearing an oversized hoodie today and it’s so, so hard to look away. „I only know his more popular songs, like _Beat It_ and _Billie Jean_ , but that’s it.“  
Donghyuck scrunches up his nose as if Mark has personally offended him and reaches inside his bag to pull out his iPod. He wordlessly gives Mark one of the earbuds and Mark watches as he navigates over the cracked screen until he has found the playlist he was looking for. 

„You’ll love this one.“, Donghyuck promises as he presses play. Mark closes his eyes and listens and surprisingly, Donghyuck was right. He asks to listen to it again and again until Donghyuck gets tired of him and just gives him the iPod to choose for himself, going back to his maths homework with a proud smile on his lips. Mark knows he should go and finish up his essay, but scrolling through Donghyuck’s music collection seems way more interesting now.

They have a similar taste, he finds, and the amount of music Donghyuck owns seems endless. He presses play on Justin Biebers „Love Yourself“ and places the iPod in between them nudging his friend with his knee.  
„I like your music taste.“, he tells him and Donghyuck smiles.

 

-

 

Mark knows his father isn’t happy. He isn’t complaining, but Mark can see it from the way he glares down at him from the stands whenever he comes to see their training. It’s not exactly because Mark has done something wrong, but because Donghyuck is doing everything right.

Everyone expected him to be good - Mr Park would never take anyone into the team who isn’t, especially not someone this age - but nobody thought he would be this good. He is kind of a prodigy with his excellent ball control and eye for opportunities. He’s a great team player and seems to never let himself get stressed out over all the training and school. Mark admires him for the way he does all of it, but he tries not to show too much because his father would probably yell at him for wasting time he could spend working on his own faults.  


-

  
„Wanna go get ice cream?“, Donghyuck asks one day when it’s hot and the sun is burning down on them. They’re doing their homework outside, on the stands because the weather is the nicest it has been in weeks.  
„We can’t.“, Mark says, pulling out his earbud. „Training starts soon.“  
„Training starts in like an hour.“, Donghyuck points out, closing his book and shifting closer. He knocks their knees together and Mark’s first instinct is to pull away because the touch burns. He doesn’t, because he secretly loves it. „Come on, it’ll be fun. You look like someone who likes green tea ice cream.“

„I don’t know.“ Mark bites his lip. The thought of ice cream makes his mouth water because he hasn’t had any in ages. „I mean I want to, but it’s not in my diet plan.“  
„You have a diet plan?“ Donghyuck looks surprised so Mark simply shrugs.   
„My dad and Mr. Park had it made for me, to fit the new training schedule.“  
Donghyuck is quiet for a few seconds.  
„Are you like, okay with this?“, he asks eventually and his voice is more careful than usual, a tone Mark has never heard from him before. „You still go to school and all, don’t you think your dad is being too serious with this?“

„I’m going to become a professional player though.“, Mark tells him. „So I suppose it’s good, my body won’t lack.“  
„You don’t sound convinced.“

„I’m not but that’s what everyone constantly tells me so it must be true.“  
Donghyuck let’s out a sigh and leans in, resting his head on Mark’s shoulder for a few seconds. Mark freezes, but doesn’t push him away. 

„Hyung?“, Donghyuck asks almost sadly. „Come on, get some ice cream with me? Just this once?“

And how could he possibly say no to that?

 

-

 

They end up going once a week and after a while Mark has tried every flavor on the menu. It’s a new ice cream parlor that has opened just a year ago and he hasn’t been there before but now he loves it. His personal favorite is Cookies and Cream because it tastes like heaven and for a while he eats it every time they go there. He thinks Donghyuck choses a new favorite each time depending on his mood - he always gives Mark a spoonful and Mark doesn’t complain, not even when his friend reaches over the table to play with his fingers.   
He knows it’s technically wrong what they’re doing, not just because he’s supposed to be on a diet but also because they’re kind of crossing the line already by just liking each other too much. Still, he can’t stop himself, isn’t planning on doing so. He doesn’t have time for romance, but he thinks he might have time for Donghyuck.

 

-

 

**_w her ar eu_ **

Mark lowkey hates texting Donghyuck because in most cases he doesn’t bother typing properly. He also loves it because Donghyuck is the only friend who doesn’t find it weird if he sends tons of stickers (mainly because he’s feeling bad for barely using them) and because their conversations are the best.

**I might be late, dad had to talk to me so I only just left the house.**

**_:((((( when will u ve theere?_ **

**I don’t know, like 15 minutes?**

**_you owe me a n ice crean mark le_ **

**_*lee_ **

Mark wants to text him back how Donghyuck is the one who’s usually late, but instead he walks faster because he feels bad enough already for making him wait. 

Donghyuck is sitting on the bench in front of the movie theatre, looking all excited when he sees Mark.   
„Sorry.“ Mark is slightly out of breath from jogging all the way and Donghyuck pokes his side and tells him that it’s fine and that he shouldn’t worry. He hands Mark the ticket for the movie they’re watching (some horrorfilm they only chose because they can’t stop fighting over who out of the two of them gets scared more easily). „How much is it?“

„Nah, it’s okay.“ Donghyuck grasps his hand when he reaches out for the wallet to pay him back, effectively stopping him from it. There’s something in his eyes Mark can’t quite describe and the touch is making him flush a little. „Just buy me food or something.“

 

Mark only relaxes when they’re standing in line for popcorn, their hands no longer touching and they’re bickering over what to get. They have decided on a medium sized bucket with sweet popcorn when Donghyuck nudges him carefully.  
„What did your dad want to talk about? Everything okay?“  
„Uhm…“ Honestly, Mark is surprised Donghyuck even remembers. It makes him happy in a weird way. „Nah, just about the training. He keeps complaining that I’m getting worse recently and he’s blaming my social life.“  
„Ah. So he’s blaming me.“  
„You’re not the only social life I have, you know.“  
„Stop lying to yourself.“ Donghyuck grins at him. „Also he should just chill out. Training is important but you should also get to live a little, don’t you think?“  
„That’s exactly what I came here to do.“, Mark mumbles, thinking how he would have never done this before becoming friends with Donghyuck. 

 

They’re not even halfway through when Donghyuck starts to chicken out, reaching out for Mark’s hand who let’s him take it. His mind yells at him to get up and tell Donghyuck something along the lines of „I’m not gay, please stop touching me like this“, but his body doesn’t listen. He intertwines their fingers and hates himself for loving these boyfriend vibes all around them. He hates himself even more when Donghyuck shrieks and hides his face in Mark’s shoulder and Mark actually pulls him in, hugging him close to his chest until all of the scary parts are over.

They walk out later, cheeks rosy and Mark walks him home and it would’ve been perfect except when Donghyuck looks like he’ll lean in for a kiss, Mark leans in for a hug instead. He can feel the disappointment engulfing them both, but there is nothing he can do, or rather, nothing he can bring himself to do yet.

 

-

 

He wonders how his teammates would react. It’s a stupid thought because nothing has happened yet, but his own thoughts keep overwhelming him recently.

_Hey Taeyong, so I might be gay._

The word tastes bitter even in his mind, something that’s supposedly bad and wrong. Mark doesn’t know if it really is, but he doesn’t know anyone who is gay and happy. Or gay and unhappy, because all Mark knows is this place where sexuality seems sort of a tabu topic. He’s read all about homophobia in sport teams and maybe he would’ve understood in the past, but now he doesn’t get what should be bad about being gay and playing soccer. He’s pretty sure Donghyuck likes boys too and Donghyuck is probably the best player this club has seen in decades.

_Hey Yuta, I sort of want to kiss Hyuckkie and I don’t know what to do, can you help me out?_

He thinks he might never tell anyone because he can imagine how his hyungs will think about it. They haven’t said anything bad about homosexuality, but it’s something that is frowned upon by society anyway, so how can he expect them to be accepting?

 

His eyes are burning with tears as he turns to his side, trying to stop overthinking. He hasn’t slept well these past few days, not since that time they went to the cinema together, but he has no idea how to stop worrying so much. He thinks he might be going through something that’s probably called something like ‚sexuality crisis‘. He thinks that Donghyuck would probably laugh if he told him, but secretly he would get worried.

There’s a few unread messages on kakaotalk when he finally gives up on sleep and reaches for his phone. Donghyuck has messaged him about twenty minutes ago, first sending a few memes and then:  
**_hyung are you awake?_**

**_i feel strange_ **

 

**Are you okay?** Mark texts back immediately, because Donghyuck doesn’t write like this, usually. Feels like something isn’t quite right.

**_hi_** Donghyuck replies after half a minute and Mark is somewhat relieved. **_oh you really ar aweake, why arent yoiu sleeping hyung ??????!????_**

 

**I don’t know, I can’t fall asleep. I keep overthinking stuff. :-(**

**Anyway what’s up, you said you felt strange.**

 

**_lmao it feels dumnb now, i guess we’re the same_ **

**_can’t stop thhinking about stuff_ **

 

**What kind of stuff?** Mark bites his lip and presses send, not sure whether he should really ask or not. But then again, why not? Maybe it’s just school or something and he’s getting it all wrong.

 

**_tbh probably the same stuff you were thinkin g about too_ **

**_maybe not and im dumb but_ **

**_i can t forget taht day we went to watch that movie_ **

 

Oh.

 

**Me neither.**

 

**_i want to ask you sth but im kinda scared so i wont_ **

 

**YOu can ask me anything**

 

**_i know but i won’t idk i dont think its the right time yet :((_ **

**_hyung but if youre thinking aboit it too_ **

**_thats kinda calming lmao_ **

**_ill try to sleep now_ **

**_goodnight_ **

 

Mark texts him a **Goodnight!** and resists the urge to throw his phone away. Instead he lies back down, trying to calm his racing thoughts. He kind of expected this from the way they’ve been acting around each other all the time, that Donghyuck also feels it. Donghyuck, who seemed to be so ready to kiss him back then, who doesn’t seem to be struggling with everything like Mark does. He deserves better, Mark thinks. Someone who doesn’t mind what everyone else thinks, someone who won’t let his family control every aspect of his life. Then again, he can’t let Donghyuck go. Not now. Maybe not ever. 

 

-

 

„You look tired.“, Donghyuck tells him the next day when they meet up in the locker room. Mark is sweaty and worn out from Dream practice and all he wants to do is to lie down for an hour until he has to force himself onto the pitch for another round of training. „No ice cream today?“   
Mark shakes his head and points at all of the homework he still has to do. Donghyuck nods and sits next to him.

„Thought so.“, he says and places a plastic coffee cup in front of Mark. „Here, you can have the rest. It’s my fave, I normally don’t like coffee that much but this is pretty tasty.“  
„Hyuck, I can’t drink coffee.“, Mark mumbles, already reaching out for it. It’s not in his diet and his father would kick his ass if he saw him drinking it, but he can’t resist, not when he’s breaking the diet on a weekly basis anyway. He tries it, sucking carefully first until he tastes the sweet, sticky liquid on his tongue. It reminds him of ice cream a little and he decides that he likes it.  
„Thanks.“  
„You’re welcome, loser.“, Donghyuck tells him. Mark feels his gaze linger for a few seconds, before he sits up, tugging at Mark’s hand. „Hey, wanna lie around in the grass and relax instead of doing homework?“  
„Then I’ll have to do it at night though.“, Mark mumbles, leaning into Donghyuck. He’s really, really exhausted and the other is a surprisingly good pillow. „I just don’t want to do it at all, to be honest.“  
„Just don’t do it then.“  
„I can’t just not do my homework. My teacher will kill me.“  
„Do they even check your homework regularly?“  
„Sometimes.“ Mark’s eyes are falling shut and he feels Donghyuck nuzzle his hair softly. He always wants to fall asleep like this, because he can’t overthink when the subject of his thoughts is the one lulling him to sleep.  
„It’s okay, hyung.“, Donghyuck mumbles. „It’s no big deal to not do it once.“

Mark wants to say something else, but he doesn’t have the strength, and then Donghyuck starts humming something that he faintly recognizes as One Direction and his voice sounds like really nice. 

 

„Hyung, wake up.“ Donghyuck’s voice is soft at his ear and Mark blinks his eyes open, feeling the confusion hit him all at once. He’s still squished up against Donghyuck, on the locker room floor and his neck hurts like hell, but he feels better than before, less like he’ll pass out from fatigue.   
„When does training start?“, Mark asks, his voice a bit rough from sleeping.  
„In like twenty minutes. I wanted to wake you now, before the other guys arrive.“, Donghyuck says, shifting away a little when Mark pulls out of the embrace, rubbing his neck.  
„Oh. Thanks.“ His first instinct is to reach for his homework and try to get at least something done, but Donghyuck has put it into his bag already, so he just lets out a sigh and gets up. Everything hurts and a bit of stretching is always good before training, so that’s what he does, ignoring Donghyuck’s eyes on him. 

Later, when he gets home and pulls out his homework, he sees the soft strokes of someone elses handwriting. His insides turn to mush when he recognizes that it’s Donghyuck’s and that he has done a huge part of the work. Some of it is wrong, but Mark doesn’t correct it but lies on his bed, holding the sheets close to his chest and wondering when his heart started aching for his best friend this much.

 

-

 

Donghyuck looks like he was sleeping when he opens the door, blinking at Mark with confusion.  
„Hyung.“, he mumbles. „What are you doing here?“

Mark shakes his head, pushing past Donghyuck to step inside.  
„Your parents home?“

„Yeah but they’re already asleep.“  
„Good.“  
Mark pushes the door shut, careful not to make too much noise, before cradling Donghyuck’s face in his hands and pressing their lips together. Donghyuck _actually_ squeaks, but kisses back after a second. They move together clumsily because they both don’t have much experience, but Donghyuck’s lips are soft and there’s fireworks erupting in Mark’s stomach. It’s better than he expected and he wants to do this forever, except Donghyuck is pulling away after a while, his breathing hard. Mark loves how deliciously swollen his lips look, so he leans in again and pecks them once more.

„Wow.“, Donghyuck mumbles, leaning back against the door. „Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining, but what exactly was this for?“  
„You did my homework.“, Mark says, blushing all of a sudden as he realizes how dumb of a reason that is to bike all the way over to Donghyuck’s house. „I…it was…“  
„Hey it’s okay.“, Donghyuck interrupts, a huge grin on his face. „Honestly, I was wondering when you would come around. You didn’t want to kiss me the other day. You know, when we went to the cinema.“  
„Was that what you wanted to ask me about?“  
Donghyuck nods, reaching out for Mark’s hand.  
„I don’t have to anymore though, do I?“  
„No.“ Mark gives him a soft smile. „Hyuck, I like you like a lot.“  
„Yeah okay.“, Donghyuck says, tugging him upstairs. Mark follows him because he doesn’t really want to leave even though he probably should since he has school tomorrow. „And like, same.“  
„Okay.“

Donghyuck’s bed is unmade and they snuggle up underneath the covers.  
„Did I wake you?“, Mark asks as they shift close, trying to find a comfortable cuddling position.   
„Nah, I was still playing a game when your message came so it’s fine.“, Donghyuck tells him absentmindedly, wrapping one arm loosely around Mark’s waist. „Hyung, can I kiss you again?“

Mark gulps and nods and Donghyuck is leaning in again, reconnecting their lips.

It’s different this time, a lot less rushed and Mark loves it a lot. 

„Hyuckie.“, he mumbles after they have pulled away and are just lying there, staring up at the ceiling. „We have school tomorrow.“  
„Let’s skip school?“, Donghyuck suggests, turning his head a little. „We’ve never skipped school together.“

„We can’t.“, Mark mumbles. He wants to bury his face in Donghyuck’s neck and just forget about tomorrow, so he does. „I’ve never skipped school before.“  
„Like…never?“, Donghyuck asks intrigued and Mark hums. „Okay then we’re definitely doing it. We can go eat ice cream, we’ve never been there in the morning.“  
„We can’t just go eat ice cream all the time.“

„Yeah we can.“ Donghyuck’s voice is tender and he is stroking the back of Mark’s neck, sending shivers down his spine (Mark never knew he could feel like this. He’s stupidly weak for everything Donghyuck does and there is just so many feelings inside of him). „I’ll buy you ice cream.“  
„Okay.“ Mark feels the blood rush to his cheeks and he doesn’t know why he’s feeling shy all of a sudden. 

They’re silent after that and for the first time in weeks Mark doesn’t fall into his usual cycle of „what if…“ and „how do i say“ and everything that comes in between. He just feels warm and comfortable, falling asleep next to Donghyuck like this, who has his arms around him and is humming a soft tune and really, he can sort out everything else some other time.


End file.
